How adversity has affected my life
There was never a magic pill or manual written to raise children successfully. Parents do the best they can with what they know, some are successful, others fail miserably and then there are some parents no matter what they did the child was who they are. In my case my parents would not have been my choice.
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Wednesday, August 13, 2025
Wednesday, July 2, 2025
Hump days are in the middle of the week.
Monday, January 15, 2018
I am safer alone
She
sits at the kitchen table listening to the water drip, drip, drip. Her memory
goes back to a time in life when she remembers how vulnerable she could be. He
controlled everything, she feared to make choices, trained from
childhood to be obedient. Sexual abuse started when she was 3.
Now
at 44, the dripping from the faucet reminds her of a time long ago when he put
his hand through the window. They are fighting over his infidelity.
He
knocks her down then sits with his knees on her forearms. She can't move,
terror red is all she sees. The blood he is dripping on her forehead is running
into her eyes.
He
says, "In Viet Nam, we use to terrorize our captives
this way. It can get worse".
Crying,
begging, rocking her head back and forth desperate to keep the blood from
running into her eyes. It's causing her to see everything through a red haze.
Blood dripped, splattered, ran down the walls. He left after that never to come
back.
Crying,
sobbing from the aftermath of abuse. She doesn't know what to clean first.
Drenched
in blood my vision blurred, I remember it well. Rinsed my eyes out than wiped
my face. Didn't figure I should change my clothes.
By
the time I washed the blood from walls, ceiling, furniture, and the floor my
clothes drenched with his diluted blood, I took off my clothes and threw them
away. Standing in the shower sobbing until the water ran clear and cold. I got
out of the shower a new woman.
Until
the next time, I meet the new one to bring terror in my life.
Now
at 62, I stay alone. After 3 relationships that brought me to the brink of
death, I'm safer alone.
Saturday, November 25, 2017
#MeToo
Feeling imprisoned by my emotions. Feeling so much anger towards people's beliefs that any kind of abuse, controlling human rights, verbal abuse, sexual assault, emotional abuse
I have news for you it's not excepted. When I heard a woman
#survivor #abused #accountability #changelaws must be more to life for victims. The narcissist attitude of men and women believing
Survivor of assault lives with it the rest of their life.
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