Questions I ask out loud

If a vegan won't eat cheese or eggs do they breastfeed their babies?

How committed is a chicken to breakfast when the pig gives it all?

What is enough when you have given everything?

I don't love you enough to hate you!

How many times must a heart be broke, the spirit crushed, dreams destroyed before the soul gives up?

Can you trust what you see when salt looks like sugar?

Jesus Christ! and he died!

How awful can something taste if it would gag a maggot?

If you build for all, who did you build for?

Why wait until your parent dies before getting to know them?

#MeToo

What it is like for me to write about anything relating to my life experiences is overwhelming.  With what is going on in the news has made it even worst for the angst, I fight off with medications.

Feeling imprisoned by my emotions. Feeling so much anger towards people's beliefs that any kind of abuse, controlling human rights, verbal abuse, sexual assault, emotional abuse is excepted in any form.

I have news for you it's not excepted. When I heard a woman yesterday say it depends on the severity of the allegations. Who makes that decision? Society, the person causing the unwanted advances? It's obvious it's not working, it must be changed.

#survivor #abused #accountability #changelaws must be more to life for victims. The narcissist attitude of men and women believing it's their human rights to do anything they want.

Survivor of assault lives with it the rest of their life.

Thank you Letter for my donating to AARDA from my eBay sales

Here is a letter that I was sent and am very proud to know I am making a difference for people with Autoimmune related diseases. Every little bit makes a difference.

September 11, 2017

Dear Donor, Artist Denise Fletcher 

On behalf of the Board of Directors of the American Autoimmune Related Diseases Association (AARDA) and myself personally, I am writing this letter of appreciation. We thank you for your financial support during this past year, whether through your online giving or your payroll campaign participation. 

Over the past year, we have been hard at work on behalf of the over 50 Million Americans living with autoimmune diseases. We could not have done any of it without your generosity. AARDA has;

• Redesigned our website www.aarda.org. We have now included a resource list for patients seeking financial help and other services.
• Focused on federal and state level advocacy issues surrounding patient-doctor-insurance communication, step therapy, non-medical switching, the AHCA, among other issues.
• Worked with others to have PDUFA (Prescription Drug User Free Act) pass both the house and senate (www.aarda.org/pdufa).
• Officially launched ARNet, the Autoimmune Research Network. This patient-powered database will connect patients and researchers in helping to better understand and create innovative treatments for autoimmune diseases.
• Continued our long-term programming including; funding the young investigators' research grant, providing patients with information and resources, holding two scientific colloquiums per year, and increasing public awareness about autoimmune diseases.

You are an important part of this AARDA mission that works to improve the lives of the 50 Million Americans and their families affected by autoimmune disease.  Your donor dollars have positioned AARDA to advocate for improved-therapies and additional research and have enabled us to support scientists of the future. Your dollars have been stretched even further through the valuable assistance of dedicated volunteers and contributed in-kind services. This has enabled us to hold our combined administrative and fundraising costs to only 8 percent of our revenues!

Again, thank you. Your kindness does not go unnoticed.  Your help does, indeed, make a difference.

With appreciation,

Virginia Ladd
President/Executive Director

February 2017 I was forced to go back on Drugs to live from the fear of my governments choice

My doctor put me back on medication for anxiety and depression, #Potus has reminded me of the fears and helplessness I lived through while I was being abused and being held captive in a trailer in the mountains of Kentucky.

I have been trying very hard to be optimistic with painting pictures and focusing on positive life choices. It started to creep up slowly in November into December. Then at Christmas, I didn't even have enough money to buy presents for my little grandchildren. Or gas money to go see my one grandson who in the system because of sexual abuse. Yet Trump literly waste Millions of dollars a day.

Then in January when this horrible man was sworn in as President of the United States my anxiety began to get worse.
I can only express my fear of this man called President of the United States who is destroying my country. In the meantime, I was forced to go back on pharmaceutical drugs so I can live from day to day without this horrible feeling of being destroyed by his views and his cohorts.  I would wake up in the middle of the night unable to breathe, yesterday it had gotten so bad I went to my doctors as a walk in and they had me get an x-ray of my chest and EKG to make sure I wasn't in heart failure.
Good news no heart problems, but the anxiety is real from Trump making me relive all my fears of being a captive in an abusive situation.

I know I cannot be the only American that is feeling this fear of destruction that is going on in Trumps organization. 

Get great gifts for anyone

Just click on the link below. Beautiful paintings, prints, much more for your home.
Art Prints of my originals many sizes to pick from

Making and effort to increase my income retirement sucks without enough money

Beautiful paintings from Michigan artist by clicking this link it will take you to FineArtAmerica

I am privileged to be able to share my artwork with other talented artists from Michigan.

Wean me off these drugs

Been a member of the Fibromyalgia English/Afrikaans quite some time and it helped me through some rough times. This past month I had enough of medication that just did not work. Told my doctor enough was enough, wean me off these drugs. It was tough. I survived the withdrawals. Less pain now, less stiffness, but thank goodness I am not being videotaped daily.

The mood swings from tears, anger, laughter, confusion, frustration and did develop high blood pressure now. I take aspirin and medical marijuana as needed, it does work. Not daily either. Just when the pain is intolerable. Now if I could just get the emotional fixed, but the pharmaceutical drugs has so many negative effects on me I would rather be known as the crazy lady who lives with 2 dogs, artist who paints pictures, and smokes pot.

My energy level skyrocketed from sleeping 14 hours a day and 10 hours of exhaustion to sleeping 6 hours a day and getting so much done that I had never dreamed possible again in my life. I was diagnosed 1996, symptoms started at least 10 years before. Saw many psychiatrists over that 10 years, no one knew what Fibro was. Had many family and friends giving me advice on exercise and diet. Even this past year had someone tell me I just needed to move more, did not respond to her skinny self (20+ years younger than me) with a husband and two sons to help her to do all the things I do not have help with. This is why I call Fibromyalgia the stupid disease, for the stupid things people say to us with the disease. They are not educated in the disease and chose not to understand the disease.

Just to tired

Haven't posted since the end of July 2016, just not enough energy to do the things I want to do.
For those who don't know, I have #Fibromyalgia disease.
Lately, illness is just too much to deal with. I don't know if it is the medication that makes me tired, the illness or getting older. Maybe it is just all three.

Positive note finally got to see my daughters oldest child he is 18 years old now. Hadn't seen him for 10 years. Wish I could say he is doing well but he isn't.

Started this post weeks ago and I am just now getting back to finishing it. LOL
But that is what it's like with Fibromyalgia. The other day it took me 6 hours to ship a box with UPS and I dried a half a load of laundry. That was it for the day.

I have been painting pictures to sell on eBay sold one of another artist but I have faith I will sell mine too.

Been going to art class one night a week to learn other styles, it is helpful.

Well got to go take a nap so I can go to class tonight.

Happy Thanksgiving to all.

We need more awareness of child abuse

Children have the smallest voices, some have no voice at all to protect themselves. Us survivors must make agencies that are supposed to be protecting them do their jobs.  Untie the hands of those who can help. I would rather be wrong than not say anything at all. I spoke out and nothing was done to the perpetrators of my three grandchildren.  Now they have to live with memories of horrific abuse. And so do I because I did not scream and carry on, if I had they would have locked me up. But at least my grandchildren would have had a chance to a normal life. Maybe.
I  ask all of you who read this share my blog. It isn't much but maybe we can save a few children in the next hour from abuse or death.

April is Child Abuse Awareness Month this link is from legacy.9news.com/

In 2013, there were 679,000 victims of child abuse and neglect throughout the United States.

1. That would be 56,583 per month.
2. That would be 155 children abused or neglected a day.
3. That would be 6.46 children an hour Everyday in The United States of America.

American Human Organization
Here is a paragraph from The American Human Organization website.

The tragedy of child abuse- and neglect-related fatalities has been brought into our homes with increasing frequency by recent media reports. There was two-month-old Tanner Dowler, who died of physical abuse at the hands of his young parents despite efforts by his grandparents to alert and prompt authorities to intervene even before he was born. And there was 14-month-old Demitri Robledo, who was tortured and starved by his male babysitter. Equally disturbing was the story of five-year-old Zachary Bennett who was fatally beaten after being returned to his father despite the fact that his father had a criminal record of domestic violence and drug abuse. And there was six-year-old Elisa Izquierdo who died at the hands of her mother in New York. Born addicted to crack cocaine, Elisa suffered a lifetime of her mother’s abuse.